It's summer break. Oh happy day. My kids are thrilled. Me? Not so much. Now before you get all riled up, I love my kids. I love spending time with them, being with them, etc. I love being a mom. But summer break is it's own kind of evil. For one, it's usually hot. And humid. And we are together 24/7 minus the one hour of daily camp or activity we have schedule. We just tend to drive each other nuts. I'm sure they are sick of me by time August rolls around.
As the kids strolled out to the kitchen this morning, I mentioned that they both needed to make their beds. This was going to be a rule. Beds will be made every morning. I make my bed every day, shouldn't they? Well, they did not agree. You would have thought I told them they had to clean up dog poop! Seriously, it takes 2 minutes. My 11 yr. old likes to argue that "why make it when you are just going to sleep in it again?" She spouted that off and I said "well why wipe your butt if you are just going to poop again" I don't know if it sunk in or she was just disgusted but her bed did get made.
So as the day progressed and idle threats were made, I started to compose a list in my head of all the annoying things my kids say and do. Again, love the little angels but come on. If you read this list and don't agree with just one, you're lying.
1. "I'm bored." Really? Because I can think of 100 things for you to do around this dirty house but you aren't going to want to do one of them so stop saying you're bored.
2. "Can I have a sip of your drink?" Yes, because I love my drink to look like a sea monkey aquarium. And that sip really means the whole drink until the ice hits you in the face and you make a mess that I will have to clean up.
3. "What are we going to do today?" Asked the MINUTE they get up and sometimes even before they go to bed. And then asked repeatedly throughout the day.
4. "That's not fair." Really? It's not fair that your brother ate the last cookie even though you just had 4? How about the starving kids in Ethiopia?
5. "Can I have a friend over?" Sure, because they 2 of you aren't driving me crazy enough, let's add a 3rd.
6. "Why can't we get a pool? Everyone else has one." Really? Um, I can name 20 people right now that don't. Can you name 20 people who do? I didn't think so, now go play in the hose.
7. "I'm hungry" said every 30 minutes. I'm pretty sure they don't get to eat all day long at school so I'm not sure why they think they should at home?
8. "Why do I have to take a bath?" Probably because you smell like goat and skid mark underwear. Apparently I need to toss a bar of Irish Spring out there during hose time.
9. "Everyone else gets to do it..." I told my daughter that I didn't care about everyone else, just her. She said "Nice Mom, you don't care about everyone. Real nice." I have no idea where she gets the snotty attitude.
10. "Can we do something fun today?" Why? Aren't you having fun fighting with each other and then repeatedly getting in trouble. Ya - me neither. So how about we all stop and take a nap. That sounds fun to mommy.
These kids! What are we gonna do? I know one day I'll look back and cry that I don't have anyone at home driving me bat crap crazy. I know I'll miss this. It's going so fast already. But can't we all just get along? It should be an interesting 89 days....not that anyone's counting.
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