The Morning Rush

It's 7:40 and I'm already ready to go back to bed.  Have you ever had one of those mornings?  Why is it, that regardless of what time we get up, the last 10 minutes before the bus comes turns into an Olympic event?  Shoes are flying, people (me) are yelling, back packs are zipped in a frenzy.

Today was one of "those" mornings!  The kids get on the bus at 7:30.  Waking them up at 6:30 gives them an hour.  One whole hour.  60 minutes to put on clothes and eat breakfast.  Sounds easy enough right?  On the occasional morning, it all goes down fine.  However, on most mornings, not so much.  This morning was a rough one.

The kids were tired, it's been a long, busy week.  Usually one of them will cry but I can count on the other to be good and get ready.  But when tears are shed by both, it's never pretty.  Both needed "just 5 more minutes" in bed.  Both ended up taking 20 more minutes despite my constant nagging.  My son couldn't get up because his legs were too cold.  My daughter couldn't get up because she was just exhausted.  Tears started to flow and I started to wonder if mimosa ingredients were in the house.

It's now 7:05.  My husband does his morning rounds of goodbye kisses before the lucky bastard gets to escape for what is about to become an extremely dramatic event.  My son is still laying in his loft bed which is way too high to physically drag him from.  My daughter's hair is beyond frizzy and there's no way we have time to straighten it which leads to an Academy Award performance on her part.  I'm still yelling like a mad woman.  We are now down to 20 some minutes to get them out the door or my pajama clad body would be taking them to school.

They finally get moving.  Clothes are slowly being put on.  I'm not too worried about my son because he runs all the way to the bus stop every morning regardless of how much time he has to get there.  It's 7:20 and breakfast is being shoveled in.  Lunches are packed and then repacked and things are moving along.  All that's left to do is brush their teeth and send them on their way.  I start to smile as I think about not having to leave the warm house.  And then all hell breaks lose.....

Buddy, our Elf on the Shelf, has been spotted!  He was in the kleenex box which sits on the back of the toilet.  Well there was no way that my son was going to go pee with that creepy Elf staring at him.  Of course, he can't move the Elf because Buddy will lose his magic.  I go in and move the kleenex box and silently curse Buddy's "handler".

It's now 7:25.  The boy is furiously brushing his teeth.  My girl has taken her toothbrush back to my bathroom so I assume she's brushing her teeth.  Of all days, my son has decided to take interest in his oral hygiene.  Of course, on a normal day, this would have thrilled me.  However, when you are 3 minutes from the bus coming, I don't have time for him to set his tooth timer and decide he's going to finally start using his Smart Rinse.  Also, his gargling skills usually end up making his cough/gag and now there's a mess to clean up and he needs a new shirt.

It's now 7:28.  I shove my son out the door with a quick kiss and "have a good day" and he's off.

One down and one to go.

My daughter comes sashaying down the hallway.  I rush her along and apparently, she still hasn't brushed her teeth.  Being the "mom of the year" and all, I hand her a piece of gum and send her on her way.  Yes, it was a stellar parenting moment.  Don't judge people.  I'll make her brush twice tonight.

Both made it to the bus on time.  At least I'm assuming they did because I closed the garage and no one came pounding on the door 5 minutes later.  Yes, I could have taken them to school.  That only buys us 10 extra minutes though.  Sure, it would have guaranteed clean teeth but I like to think that I'm teaching them about real life folks....you know, deadlines, responsibility, etc.  Yes, I'm incredibly blessed that I get to stay in my pajamas and can just send them out the door.  I do not envy working moms who not only have to get their kids out the door, but also themselves and head to a day full of work.  If I ever go back to work, I think my hours would have me leaving before the kids even had to get up!  But then again, my kids get their love of sleep from me, so maybe that wouldn't work either.

So all that being said, I would consider this morning a success.  While that may be shocking to all of you, no one got grounded or had privileges taken away.  Success.  Both kids left with dry eyes, no tears.  Success.  They made it to the bus.  Success.  Both had a hot breakfast, didn't have to eat on the way to the bus.  Success.  One had clean teeth.  Success (at least in my book).  I'll take these small successes as they come.  After all, if this morning was an Olympic Event, we may not have gotten the gold but we still made it past the finish line.

And now I'm off to clean up Smart Rinse from the sink and counter.  And mirror.

Axl Rose had it right....

The past few days have been challenging for me as a parent.  Everything worked out fine but I find myself always wondering how much I'm screwing these kids up?  Really, as a parent, do you ever catch yourself thinking "oh crap!"  I do.  Sometimes on a daily basis.

When our kids are little, we are told to trust our instincts.  Sure, if my child has a temperature, my instinct is to give her medicine or take her to the doctor.  Or if they fall down, instincts have you kissing their boo boo and telling them everything will be alright.  But at what point do you have to take a minute and question those same instincts?  Like when your middle school daughter comes home with hurt feelings over something a nasty girl said to her?  Do you trust your instincts and go tell the little snot off at recess?  Um, no.  What I really wanted to say to my daughter was "That girl is a little beotch and karma is gonna get her" but as a parent, I held my "instincts" in.

While raising children, we make a lot of mistakes.  Luckily, all the ones we make while they are babies, they aren't going to remember.  Your child isn't going to remember the time he had a blow out diaper and you almost puked, so you just cut the onsie off of him and threw it away.  He won't remember the time you cut his little toe nail too short and you were sure he was gonna bleed out so you stuck his toe in a bowl of flour so it would "clot" faster because that's what the vet told you to do with your dog.  She won't remember the time you got a rubber band stuck in her hair so you had to cut a small section out and pray her curls would cover it.  But she will remember how you react when she's 11 and her feeling are hurt.  She'll remember the words you said to make her feel better and the way you hugged her and let her cry it out while you tried to hold in your own tears because you hate to see her so disappointed.

People say actions speak louder than words but they forget to tell you that words often hurt much worse than actions.  My parenting instincts kick in and I want to make everything better for my kids.  But does solving all their problems for them really help them in the long run.  Sure, we both probably would have felt better if we told that girl off, but luckily, we didn't.  There were actually several things I wanted to do but I did nothing.  I was patient and just hoped that it would work it self out.  I trusted my instincts that I had raised my daughter well enough that she would be able to handle the situation herself.  And you know what, she did.

So I guess when Axl Rose sang his G&R hit song and said "Woman take it slow, and it'll work itself out fine...all we need is a little patience"  he may have knew what he was talking about.  But I will trust my instincts not to take any other parenting advice from him.